John C. Bain

Everyone of us has dealt with a betrayal in our career.  It may be the person that took the credit for your work, the peer that advances unethically, the leader who doesn’t follow through on commitments, or the individual that launched an all out attack on you, undermining everything you did.  If you haven’t experienced some level of betrayal while working, then you may be dealing with another challenge…never allowing yourself to be trusting or vulnerable.

During the course of my career, I have experienced different types and levels of betrayal.  Here are some things that God has taught me during these times.

1. Be careful not to misinterpret.  Many times what may seem like a betrayal may not be.  Always seek to understand first.  Acknowledge that what may seem like betrayal could actually be God’s hand moving on your behalf in the form of either protection or affirmation to make a change.
2. Acknowledge brokeness.  We ourselves are broken by sin.  We live in a broken world with broken people who think broken thoughts that take broken actions.  When we focus on the reality of our own sins, the sins of others become less dramatic.  This is what Jesus taught when he said, “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?  How can you say to your brother, ‘Brother, let me take the speck out of your eye’, when you yourself fail to see the plank in your own eye?”
3. Forgive.  Choosing to forgive is a release.  It releases you from trying to pass judgement on the other person to allowing God to judge.  It releases you from bitterness.  Bitterness will destroy you and your potential.  I heard it said that bitterness is like you drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.
4. Instead of asking, “Why me?”, ask “What now?”.  Use the situation as a catapult into a deeper relationship with God.  What does God want to do in your and through you as a result of this situation?  What now does God want to teach you?  I have found that these times of challenge open my eyes to more and more of God’s truths for my life.
5. Move forward boldly.  Just like when we are driving, we only need to look in the rear-view mirror periodically for perspective and to avoid danger.  If you spend all your time in the rear-view, you’re going to crash or miss the path God has for you.  Fix your eyes forward using this experience to grow closer towards the person that God wants you to be.  Take comfort in knowing that God is bigger than your betrayal, and that he can take what is a negative situation and use it for good.

>Over the course of my life, I have been exposed to some exceptional leaders both directly or indirectly.  It has been a blessing to be able to work for, work with, lead and learn from a vast variety of leaders directly.  I am so thankful that there is also incredible access to learn from leaders indirectly today through books, blogs, podcasts, articles, seminars and so on.  In my experience, there is a commonality that has shown itself in all great leaders…they are all consummate learners.

One of my most memorable exposures to a always learning leader was spending time with Don Soderquist, the retired Senior Vice Chairman and C.O.O. of Walmart.  Don epitomized having a rigorous thirst for right knowledge.  He shared with me stories of how he and Sam Walton would spend hours learning from their direct competition and from market leaders in other business segments.  Additionally, I found Don to be a wealth of knowledge on leadership from a broad spectrum of other great leaders.  The most striking thing was his absolute humility in recognizing that God was always teaching him something about himself and how he could become more like Christ.  The time I spent with Don significantly changed my approach to leadership.    

The thing to realize as a leader is that you will never arrive.  Leadership is a journey that unfolds, not a destination that is reached.  As leaders, we ALWAYS need to be LEARNING.  Each leader has to find their own unique style of learning and be intentional about taking time to develop personally.  Below are the ways that I work to be always learning, some may work for you, others won’t…the important thing is to find your stride and LEARN!

• Spending quiet time, alone with God.  There is nothing that can replace prayer and the learning that comes through the direction of the Holy Spirit.  For me, this has to be the first thing I do each morning for it to have my best.
• Engaging the Bible.  We are a part of God’s amazing story.  The Bible has us written into it.  I have yet to find a time in my life where the Bible didn’t teach me more and more about who I am and whose I am.
• Reading books.  At times, I’ll read one book at a time and really dissect the content.  There are other times where I may have three to fours books going at once with more of an overview approach.
• Spend time with people.  You can learn something from everyone you meet.  The key here is to be a good listener.  I love learning from others and applying to my life.
• Reading blogs.  There are several blogs that I follow and read daily.  I love the quick hit appeal of good blogs.
• Listening to podcasts.  These are great for drive time.  
• Meeting with mentors.  Having great mentors is irreplaceable.  I work to meet with mentors at least once a month.
• Attending seminars.  It is usually the case that seminars fall when you can’t afford to go either financially or from a time perspective, but seminars can be a way to get access to leaders directly that you would otherwise not have.  I’ve never attended a seminar and not come out with at least one to two improvement items.